At Attention

Friday, July 13, 2007

Question

Do you know anything about the Mango products or anything else that can allow me to piss standing up? I am an FTM (female-to-male transsexual) who is far enough along in transition that using the women's room is no longer possible. I realize I'll still have to use a stall, but being able to piss facing the john instead of sitting down would make it a lot more comfortable in there. I still feel like I'm going to get "found out" and arrested every time I enter the men's room.

Answer

Social behavior inside restrooms is different for men and women. Women tend to check each other out. They may even chat with strangers at the sink, while combing their hair or washing their hands. The assumption is that the women's restroom is a safe zone where men cannot intrude. It's a place where "the girls" [sic] can relax, let their hair down, show emotion, weep, or get themselves together after a good cry. But the men's room is a zone of potential sexuality. Everybody knows that queers will try to approach you in the bathroom. Men therefore demonstrate that they are not queer by avoiding any contact with one another. They don't look at each other's faces—and especially not each other's genitals at the urinal. Cleaning up is done with a minimum effort and very little, if any, conversation. If your breasts are not visible and you have a little facial hair, or even if you simply look so masculine that you are challenged in women's bathrooms, you will be safer and less likely to be interrogated in a men's restroom.

Mango (so you can GO like the MAN you are, get it?) products can be found at www.mangoproducts.net. They actually produce several useful devices for FTMs. They make packers (soft phalluses that can be worn in your underwear to produce the illusion of a package), prostheses for transmen who have had metoidioplasty or phalloplasty (surgeries to create male genitalia), chest binding vests, harnesses, etc. The urinal aide is basically a packing dick with a tube in it. The end of the tube that goes against your body has an oblong oval spoon to collect the piss and create a leak proof seal around your body.

I think that the only way to know if this device is going to help you or not is to buy one and practice with it. The manufacturers claim that it is foolproof, but I wouldn't try it outside of your home without several practice sessions in the shower. Some guys seem to be built such that the Mango prosthesis works perfectly for them; I have a hell of a time getting it to work without leaking profusely.

The main advantage of the Mango aide is that you theoretically could use a urinal with it, if you get good enough at positioning the collecting device. It looks quite realistic, and it's appropriately sized for the average guy. You won't look like you've got a permanent hard-on if you keep it on all day. I would recommend using their harness for this, however, since tucking the aide in your underwear could have awkward consequences if the little sucker fell out.

If you simply want to enter a stall, lock the door, face the toilet and piss, there are other devices that do not look phallic, but will collect the urine without leakage. The Urinelle cone is biodegradable and can be flushed down the toilet when you're done. Go to www.urinelle.biz. The P-Mate can be used only once, but should not be flushed. See more info at www.p-mate.com. The TravelMate is a plastic tube with a collecting cup; their web site is www.travelmateinfo.com. I like the Freelax, a plastic device that's reusable and shaped just right to fit between my ample thighs. But it's hard to find on the web. Look at www.perso.orange.fr/freelax/index.html. The Pee-Zee is $12, made in Canada, and is reusable. It folds flat between uses. It's a plastic rectangle that unfolds to collect the piss, and it never leaks unless you're too drunk to walk a straight line. See more at pee-zees.tripod.com or order it from this website.

All of these things are cheaper than the Mango. But they are also made for women, and you might find the language in the ads upsets you too much to make use of the devices. Some of us find that wearing a packer and handling a phallus in order to piss validates our gender identity and keeps us a little more sane during a tough day. Many guys do recommend the Mango, especially those on the slender side. I don't want to discourage you from using it, but I did want to give you some honest feedback about my own experience. Best of luck to you!