Great Balls of Ire

Friday, December 18, 2009

Question

My boyfriend enjoys having his cock and balls played with very roughly. I am happy to oblige him in this request, but I worry that I will render him sterile or at the very least a candidate for the emergency room. He says he knows his limit, but believe me, I feel like I'm whaling pretty hard on his twig and berries and his reaction barely registers. There seems to be a guide out for just about everything sexual these days. Any recommendations in the cock and ball torture (CBT) department?

The Reluctant Ball Buster

Answer

Though the home vasectomy kit offered at www.vasectomy-information.com/pages/diyvas.htm is clearly intended as a gag, you most definitely don't want to risk ending up in one of those situations where life imitates an Onion headline. Luckily, there are a couple of books to help you avoid this possibility so you can proceed with your sadistic intimate escapades confidently.

The Family Jewels: A Guide To Male Genital Play And Torment, by Hardy Haberman, is thorough and practical, covering male genital anatomy and, without fear-mongering, the risks of handling it vigorously. It describes categories of play such as constriction, compression and percussion as well as equipment, both designed specifically for the job and "pervertables" — ordinary household items that may be used in a pinch. There's also a fairly detailed section on genital rope bondage.

My intern, Dimitri, also recommends the updated Leatherman's Hand-book, by Larry Townsend, as a good source for safe and creative CBT scenes.

Another manual you may want to have around is Jay Wiseman's Toybag Guide To Dungeon Emergencies And Supplies. It doesn't cover CBT per se but is handy if you do encounter a crisis. Wiseman is especially precise about never hesitating to call EMS or visit the emergency department if things go awry. "It's also a good idea to have both participants watch some CBT porn," says CBT aficionado Pup Zeus. "It's a chance for both partners to be vocal about tips, ideas, degree of impact and so on." Pup Zeus recommends titles from Shotgun Video (http://www.shotgunvideo.com), though he does caution that they're on the rather extreme end of things.

"And I mean extreme, from bowling balls to weights used in strength training," he says. "The most impor-tant point to stress is safe play. And if someone has gone as far as he or she is comfortable going, then that should be it."

In other words, you should be permitted your boundaries as well, Reluctant.

If you're interested in more hands-on schooling in CBT, I would suggest contacting a reputable dominatrix who offers it on her bill of fare. Many will give instruction, for a fee, on this form of play. Make some calls, ask some questions and see if you can set up a rendezvous for you and the boy. An hour or two should provide you with some pleasing new tricks.